1. Be delusional about being fast-twitch, despite the facts that your forearms can clean a the barrel of a BB gun, have the calf development of a parrot, and I can barely slip a credit card under your feet when you do a vertical jump.
2. Do the plank as your primary core exercise.
3. Do three total body workouts a week. Stay away from split routines, you will gain enormous size and mass on them.
4. Stay away from training more than once a day. That would make you gain record size and strength in very little time.
5. Eat carbs & fizzy casein while you train. This way you can kill all neural drive neurotransmitters like dopamine and acetylcholine.
6. Stop lifting the bar as soon as it decelerates. This will ensure you will never tap into the high threshold motor units, the ones with the biggest potential for hypertrophy.
7. Worry excessively about getting enough carbs in your diet. This way you can still protein underfed.
8. Assume that every strong athlete who trains more than once a day is a steroid freak.
9. Piss and moan that good supplements are expensive. Wasting time making no progress is more expensive.
10. Read everything on strength training but keep debating successful strength coaches on why you keep following the given above nine steps.
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