If pleasure is a nutrient, then I’m the ultimate hedonist.  I love food.  I love fatty food.  And I love chocolate.  I was recently interviewed for a slot on a The Chew, and the producer asked me what my last meal would be.  “Oh, the death row meal?” I replied.  “That’s easy.  An ice-cold Belvedere martini with three olives, blinis and smoked salmon with caviar and crème fraiche, sautéed fois gras on toast points, and a gooey chocolate molten cake.” 

“Okay”, she said.  “If you were a food, what would you be?”  Again, a no-brainer. 

“Red wine and dark chocolate.  Dark and bitter at first, but gradually opens up with some fresh air and gets better with time.”  (Clearly, I have given this all a lot of thought.  But apparently it wasn’t good enough, because I’m still waiting to get on the show.  Can I hear it for the sistahs?)

My point is this: I never feel guilty when I want to indulge.  Years of practice have enabled me to eat right through my cravings.  Many moons ago I heard Debra Waterhouse, the author of Why Women Need Chocolate, speak at Simmons College.  She spoke about the concept of eating around a craving and why it’s a waste of time.  Instead, she advised, you should just eat exactly what you want and get through it quickly and effectively.  I have adopted the policy over the years and find it works quite well.  The hardest part is figuring out exactly what you want to eat.  For years my go-to candy bar was a Snickers.  That, and only that, would satisfy my craving when I had a hankering for something sweet.  So once a month, I had a Snickers, and that was that.  But let’s say that I really, really had a craving for cheese here and now.  I would have exactly that and stop when I was satisfied.  Trying to eat something healthier when you truly have a craving just won’t do it.  If you can’t get no satisfaction from a healthier option, you’re going to keep eating until you do feel satisfied, and may actually wind up eating more than you intended. 

Indulging and giving ourselves permission to eat what we want when we truly want it takes all the guilt out of eating.  But, you have to really want something and you can’t just eat it because it’s there or you’re bored.  So many of my clients are terrified that if they’ll give in to a craving they’ll never be able to stop.  They don’t believe they can get to the other side of the craving, which is usually just around the corner.  It’s hard to trust what you can’t see.  Trusting yourself and letting go is a process that we know as children and wind up re-learning as adults.  But I promise you if you truly listen to your cravings and honor them, you will stop when you are satisfied.  Having cravings is a perfectly normal part of life.  How to handle your cravings will have a profound impact on the way you live your life—forever.

Live Gorgeously,
Esther